Wednesday, 14 October 2015

Nestle have mastered nutritional alchemy

I thought I'd had enough exposure to the Health Star Rating clusterfuck, but I notice that more products are putting stars on their labels and the stupidity is becoming unavoidable.

Taking a lead from Uncle Toby's very healthy sugary breakfast cereal, Nestle are in on the act and have a spectacular 4 and a half stars (out of 5) for:

Which is comprised of:



Yes, that's what it says - 46.4% sugar per 100g of 'healthy' milo. 

How is that possible, you may ask. Well, when you dilute 20g of milo in white water (aka skim milk), the sugar percentage magically reduces to 21%. Which is still a shitload of sugar, but given the 5% saturated fat and 20% protein, the combination is seemingly enough to push the bullshit meter up to 4 and a half stars. 

Funnily enough, the label says that if you're so ignorant of what is healthy that you use reduced fat milk, you only benefit from a 3 star drink. 

But of course no one is that stupid. 



Nestle and Uncle Toby clearly enjoy playing silly buggers and to be quite honest, I admire their dry sense of humour. Heading over to the Nestle site, there are non-stop giggles with a very informative fact sheet on sugar

I think we can all learn something from Nestle - that healthy eating (as endorsed by the nutritional authorities) is quite easy. Simply eat whatever sugary crap you like by sticking it in a blender with 200ml of skim milk and what you get is 4 and a half stars of nutritional alchemy. 

Brilliant.

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